It just not fair

Dear diary,

During my nursing days, i always miss the time to meet my dad, my lil bro and sis always have the extra time to meet him, i could meet him during my sat and sun, but its just too tiring for me.

And now, i finally had lots of time to meet my dad, tats why i went to my cousin's house and sleepover for abt 1week, and i wan to wait to see my dad and mayb he too could sleepover too, his off days is on thrs, fri and sat, so from mon to wed, i keep on wishing tat dad could have time to see us there...and yes he did come but for only a few hours, he didnt even take us out...ok, i dont mind, cuz i know he got tis small buisness to took care of..

The thing tat totally had my eyes watery is yesterday.
Yesterday was the day i got so jealous of my cousin, cuz they had both their parents beside them, they had fun together, laughing all the way, me and brother try to blend in...as for my bro, he is still thinking of playing, so he wont really feel it but i felt tis thing tat i need at least a parent to b beside, although when me dad bro and sis go out together, although i dont really ask for much things, i could feel at least there is someone to take care of us, b there for us, but for yesterday, totally nothing...told one of my cousin abt it, she can do nothing but just keep me company...i cried silently when on the way bck to my cousin's place by car, when reach, i try to calm myself down my walking a bit further from home, taking in fresh air, and i silently got home take a cold bath, eat dinner, and sleep, all the way, i was silent, unless i need something badly...


-Notes-
Ayah, kenape ayah selalu mcm blame along pasal along buzy dgn sch and takde mase untok jumpe ayah? along memang buzy dgn sch, and holiday along tak same mcm adik2, skrg, along dah holiday, and holiday along at least leh same2 dgn andi, kali ni along memang doa2, ayah dpt dtg sini sampai mlm, atau ajak kte keluar, tapi ayah cume dpt dtg untok tunjokkan barang2 buisness, and dlm berape jam je, ayah nak kene alik, along dah lame tak jumpe ayah, and ni yg ayah buat kat along? Ape? along dah besar tak perlukan seorg ayah?? Ayah, ni kali yg hampir2 penghabisan untok along manje2 dgn ayah, dpt jumpe ayah, leh suruh ayah belikan barang, leh ketawe2 dgn ayah, leh have lots of time together, tapi ayah just tak fikir...next year, along dah mula kerja and ns, ns je dah 2 tahun along tak leh keluar singapore, selepas ns, along dah umur 21 and mesti along dah berkerja, dah de duit sendiri

Ni dah masuk 5tahun ayah and ibu dah tak tinggal same2, baru sekarang along rase ke hilangan seorg ayah, and ayah dahde fam baru, lupe along and adik2....

Why when a father/husband not staying together with family, and had a new family, will forget abt the importants abt the old family? Why???

I WANT SOMEONE TO ANSWER FOR ME TAT, EXPLAIN TO ME IN DETAILS!!! MAKE ME UNDERSTAND!!!!